I have an obsession with hats you see, I just love wearing them. Admittedly, I try not to wear them out in public that often as hats don’t really suit me. Vests are a problem as well. Maybe if I actually went to the gym vests wouldn’t be so bad.
Yes, I am complaining that I can’t pull off a vest.
I think I discovered when vests were a problem roughly in 2011.
Zante, ohhhh Zante.
There I was, on a holiday with my friends, minding my own business, burnt to a crisp, when I am approached by a girl. This was unusual but who am I to be rude to someone approaching me for a conversation. Maybe she liked my Tan? Maybe she thought muscles was overrated?
Well for starters she didn’t even say hello, in fact the only thing she said to me was, “Promise me you will never wear a vest again. Please do not wear them, they do not suit you”.
It is extremely difficult to laugh such a crushing request off a complete stranger. She had gone out of her way, to come up to me, a complete stranger and ask, well plead, for me to never wear a vest again. Naturally I laughed it off, it was funny. Its okay Bry, if no one can see the tears then maybe they aren’t really there.
I can hand on heart say, I have not worn a vest since that night. Did I mention it was crushing?
When I first moved to Liverpool in 2008, I was still in my, “casual phase”. This basically means I took great pride in looking like the love child of Liam Gallagher and a football hooligan. I loved it.
I was the only one. It was never well received when I used to swagger to the on campus shop in my green Paul Smith Hoody, that was two sizes two big for me (I still own and wear it occasionally) but I think the thing that really annoyed everyone on campus was my ‘Fishing hat’. It was a bucket hat. I loved it. Thinking about it, I should of wrote a book on ‘How not to make friends in a new city’ and told everyone to do the opposite. I would be a millionaire. My best friend, my godsons father, even thought I was an utter twat when he first met me. Ha Jokes on you Sean, you love me now! 😘❤️
Makes complete sense really, study engineering, so climb a hill? 🙃
Not a lot of people know this but deep down I am a chav at heart and it took many years during the evolution of Bry to stop dressing like one. Still, I wear baseball caps and adidas tracky bottoms around my apartment all the time 😂
I remember this pink Lacoste polo like it was yesterday. My most treasured piece of clothing growing up. I loved it like it was my own flesh and blood. I actually have no idea what happened to it, RIP, you will be missed!
If you didn’t own a beanie hat at Uni circa 2010, did you even go to Uni? I am pretty certain I used to sleep in mine. In fact, people used to actually go out in them. Flocks of lads in a grey beanie from primark in a sweaty club. Crazy. Naturally I was also one of them, an excuse to wear a hat out, erm yes please!
Since this post has been more of a tale of one lad and his love for hats, despite how they betray him, I might as well share Portugal. One, that my friends still laugh about today.
Essentially, my love for fedoras got the better of me.
I wish I could say that this is the picture everyone talks about, alas, it isn’t. This picture is why you don’t get too drunk, too soon and become gobby with your friends before the flight. Well done T. I actually didn’t even realise what he had done until after I got my luggage. 😫
Where was I? Oh yes, postponing the inevitable. Not that long ago, I think 2014, I went on holiday with my sister. All in all, we had a good time. I think we needed that time together as growing up wennever really got on, but this isn’t about that, this is about this hat I keep leading you all on with. I mentioned my love for fedoras, well there I was, in Portugal, when I saw it, I thought I could pull it off, I thought it would change the way I look in hats for ever. It was not a success.
If you have got this far, then guess what ? You aren’t sleeping tonight after seeing that. Haunting. Who needs enemies eh?! 😂🤦🏼♂️😩🙃
Now I like to think that it wasn’t as bad as perhaps it is being portrayed.
Reflecting back, it’s clear that either my friends are terrible humans and should of told me or they did tell me, and I chose to ignore them. Ignorance is bliss!